Either he doesn't know what essential means, or he's expecting some pretty bad flooding.
Guardian writer Lucy Mangan had her own views of the essential approach to swimming: "Spend the years five to 12 working out how you can get changed without showing your knickers and/or being molested by the gym teacher. Spend 12 to 18 pretending you are having a six-year period.
Spend the rest of your life working out how you can get changed and go swimming without showing any flesh at all."
She's joking. But only just.
A senior writer for The Sunday Times, Simon Jenkins, produced a long article about what he calls an epidemic of hyper-caution. He told his readers: "A youth worker will not take an adventure tour without a stack of signed forms and indemnities."
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