It was that conversation that made me realise that I have always operated what I now refer to as a "conceptual bank balance". When you first encounter members of the difficult crew, there is usually little that is endearing about them. They are in your face, sceptical about what you can offer, often abusive and unco-operative. They break all the rules, quite intentionally, to push the boundaries and to see how you will react.
To write them off there and then would be pointless and defeat the object of seeking to work where it hurts the most.
The way I have dealt with this is to give such individuals some immediate "credit" - an overdraft if you like. But I have never been prepared for them to trade on my goodwill forever. There is always a difficult balance to strike between the monopolisation of your time by a few of the awkward squad, and the needs and expectations of the many. The challenge for my practice is to win them over, so that they, and our relationship, do not go bankrupt. And I can honestly say that only one has ever done so.
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