RESOURCES: Toolbox - Valentine's treatment can work two ways

Ask young people about the advantages and disadvantages of having one day in the year when it is OK to be romantic. Is it a chance for people to declare what they feel? Or is it an artificial pressure that distorts people's thoughts about each other?

What about people who don't get a card? How does it feel to think that the whole world has an admirer, except you?

Some people send Valentine's as a joke. But jokes that the receiver takes seriously can be damaging. The story of Thomas Hardy's novel Far From the Madding Crowd is based on a joke Valentine's card. It completely unbalanced a respectable bloke. That was written 130 years ago,but might it still happen today?

Last year, police in Sussex sent out Valentine's cards to known car criminals and burglars. It was meant to be a light-hearted warning. But when Gary Williams got his, his girlfriend hit him over the head with an ashtray.

He is now trying to sue the police for the distress caused.

The commercial forces behind the day are staggering. The flower industry goes into overdrive, selling 22 million worth of imported flowers, including seven million red roses. But how important are outward shows of romance?

Do women and men think differently about this?

Text messages are expected to boom again this year. Last year more than 30 million WUBMVs were sent. It is hard to resist the idea of having a secret admirer, which is one reason the lovebug computer virus was so damaging. People who should have known better opened a file because it said "I love you" on it. One religious leader said they deserved what they got for following their unfaithful urges.

A couple of years ago a local radio station ran a Valentine's Day competition, entered by unhappy couples.

The prize was a paid-for divorce. The presenter ran it because he was fed up with the usual slushy sentimentality. Does anyone feel the same?