Shared experiences can forge long-lasting bonds

She was much loved by the young people who attended, often described by them as their "rock". Her day job was at the local factory and she certainly didn't have, or aspire to have, the sophisticated understanding and approach to youth work that the textbooks proclaim. But what she did have was the capacity to forge deep and lasting, trusting and respected relationships with young people – indeed, as we shall see, relationships that have lasted a lifetime.

One Saturday evening in 1986, an ad hoc band performed in the youth centre to say thank you to Jean. It was composed of four recent youth club members and me. We had a handful of acoustic rehearsals and got on stage with some rather makeshift amplification equipment. The songs were mainly old classics by Bowie, Dylan and the Stones. I flippantly named the band "Pastit" and we had a go. It was the spirit of the occasion, rather than the quality of the performance, that mattered as we thanked Jean for her lengthy contribution to the youth club.