OPINION: Youth work is a site for honest dialogue

Let me propose an alternative scenario, one that I practised, with some risk, for many years. When I used to do a lot of residentials, I would have a broad planning discussion with the young people who were going.

This was not about the programme or curriculum, simply about basic tasks that had to be done and expectations about conduct and behaviour. Shopping, cooking, cleaning, sleeping and other issues were usually agreed swiftly.

The sticking point was always alcohol. Can we drink, they would say. To their surprise, sometimes, I would say yes. But my good-guy persona was by no means unconditional. It took the form of a deal. I wanted to know what they proposed to drink. Invariably, it was too much, both in type and quantity of alcohol. I wanted to encourage sensible drinking: a few cans throughout the evening, not getting bladdered as quickly as possible (as they were accustomed to doing at parties). It was a protracted negotiation. Once agreed, the final part of the deal was that all alcohol was visible: any additional drink that was concealed, if I discovered it, gave me the right to dispose of everything they had brought. This, they maintained, was unfair: if they put their drink on the table, someone might steal it. This allegation allowed me to introduce the broader question of mutual trust and responsibility. After all, we were all in it together and there would be no-one else around.