Ask the Experts: How should social workers dress?

Q. Does appearance matter for social workers?

Colin Green: We need to present ourselves in a way that is respectful to children and families. How we look should be part of how we convey they are important to us. This means dressing and presenting ourselves neatly and with care, and appropriately for different activities or occasions. Playing with children will require a different kind of "neat and with care" from attending court or accompanying a parent to a housing office.

We should not bring too much of our personal views or image into our work with children and families. This means fairly neutral dress. Badges and T-shirts stating a point of view should be avoided, as should revealing clothing. By being neutral in our personal presentation we show we are open to whatever children and families want to say or bring to us.

Dressing neatly and with care shows children and families we are orderly and in control. This can help convey, in a small way and especially at a first meeting, that we are going to be able to help them sort out their problems. A scruffy or chaotic look is unlikely to give children and families confidence.

Colin Green has been a social work practitioner, manager and leader, including director of children's services, in six local authorities

Q. I am working with a family where the mother died very recently. The father is struggling to cope with his own grief as well as that of his three children aged from four to 15. How do I support them?

Jeanie Lynch: The death of a parent or partner is devastating and the father and children will be experiencing a range of emotions including shock, loss and perhaps a sense of guilt as they struggle to support each other.

Appropriate bereavement support needs to be identified as a first step. Organisations such as Winston's Wish and Cruse Bereavement Care can help. For the father, it may be worth exploring what family support organisations are available to help him to deal with practicalities in the home. Organise a family meeting - including extended family - to look at what support is needed as well as exploring the help youth services and children's centres may be able to offer.

Jeanie Lynch has more than 20 years' experience working as a senior manager developing support for vulnerable children and young people

Q. A group of young people from a local children's home recently joined our youth club. They are great kids but tend to run riot when they are here as they feel "free" and unmonitored and this is upsetting existing members. How should we handle this?

Tracie Trimmer-Platman: These are just the kind of young people you should be focusing on. What have you done to induct this group into the club and share club rules or guidelines? Do they know what is expected of them?

You could hold a club meeting to introduce the newcomers and do some "getting to know you" activities - team building or bonding exercises to strengthen relationships between all members.

Consider creating a "buddy" scheme where you match up existing members with a new member.

Matching new members with a named youth worker may also help them feel more supported and secure. Talk to staff from the children's home and find out any useful background that may help. Inevitably, the newcomers will come with insecurities and stresses linked to being in care.

Tracie Trimmer-Platman is senior lecturer in youth and community work at the University of East London

Q. I want to improve how we teach children to count at my nursery. Where do I start?

June O'Sullivan: Very young children start to count spontaneously using numbers they hear or know in random order. Your goal is to help children understand anything can be counted but it has to be done using the correct sequence.

Counting is best learned if repeated throughout the day. Use rhymes, songs, books, stories, and play. Devise specific number activities as well as weaving counting into the nursery routine such as counting up and down stairs or place settings at lunchtime.

It helps enormously if you get children to touch the object they are counting or if you tap them on the head or shoulder when counting them.

Learning to count is important for children to develop early maths skills. Encourage parents to practice counting at home.

June O'Sullivan is chief executive of the childcare charity and social enterprise, the London Early Years Foundation

Email questions, marked "Experts", to cypnow@markallengroup.com